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- Adultery in a house is like a worm in poppy seeds —Babylonian Talmud
- Adultery’s like the common cold, if one bedfellow contracts it, his companion automatically does —Robert Traver
- Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse —Arthur Baer, New York Journal American
- Bridesmaids in their flowery frocks bloom round the bride like hollyhocks —Ogden Nash
- The death of a man’s wife is like cutting down an ancient oak that has long shaded the family mansion —Alphonse de Lamartine See Also: DEATH
- Divorced men are like marked-down clothes; you get them after the season during which they would have made a sensation, and there is less choice, but they’re easier to acquire —Judith Martin
- Divorce is like a side dish that nobody remembers having ordered —Alexander King
- For an artist to marry his model is as fatal as for a gourmet to marry his cook: the one gets no sittings, and the other no dinners —Oscar Wilde
- For an old man to marry a young girl is like buying a new book for somebody else to read —Anon
- Getting married is like a healthy man going into a sickbed —Isaac Bashevis Singer
- Getting married is serious business. It’s kinda formal, like funerals or playing stud poker —line from 1940 movie, They Knew What They Wanted The actor voicing this was William Gargan.
- He [husband of long-standing] is like an old coat, beautiful in texture, but easy and loose —Audrey Colvin, letter to New York Times/,Ll July 17, 1986
- A husband, like religion and medicine, must be taken with blind faith —Helen Rowland This has been modernized from “Like unto religion.”
- Husbands, like governments must never admit they are wrong —Honoré de Balzac
- Husbands are like (motor) cars; all are good the first year —Channing Pollock
- Husbands are like fires, they go out when unattended —Zsa Zsa Gabor
- Husbands should be like Kleenex, soft, clean and disposable —Madeline Kahn, interview, television news program, December, 1985
- A husband without ability is like a house without a roof —Spanish proverb
- It [a second marriage] is the triumph of hope over experience —Samuel Johnson
- It [marriage] resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated; often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing any one who comes between them —Sydney Smith
- It’s [the permanence of marriage] like having siblings: you can’t lose a brother or a sister. They’re always there —Germaine Greer, Playboy, January, 1972
- It [marriage and motherhood] was like being brainwashed, and afterward you went about numb as a slave in some private, totalitarian state —Sylvia Plath
- Like suicide, divorce was something that had to be done on a thoughtless impulse, full speed ahead —R. V. Cassill
- A man’s wife should fit like a good, comfortable shoe —Ukrainian proverb
- A man with a face that looks like someone had thrown it at him in anger nearly always marries before he is old enough to vote —Finley Peter Dunne
- Many a marriage has commenced like the morning, red, and perished like a mushroom … because the married pair neglected to be as agreeable to each other after their union as they were before it —Frederika Bremer
- Marriage may be compared to a cage: the birds outside frantic to get in and those inside frantic to get out —Michel de Montaigne The simile also appeared in a play by a sixteenth century dramatist, John Webster, beginning “Marriage is just like a summer bird cage in a garden.” See the French proverb below for yet another twist on the same theme.
- Marriage from love, like vinegar from wine, a sad, sour, sober beverage —Lord Byron
- Marriage is a good deal like a circus: there is not as much in it as is represented in the advertising —Edgar Watson Howe
- Marriage is a hand grenade with the pin out. You hold your breath waiting for the explosion —Abraham Rothberg
- Marriage is like a three-speed gearbox: affection, friendship, love —Peter Ustinov
- Marriage is like a beleaguered fortress; those who are without want to get in, and those within want to get out —French proverb
- Marriage is like a dull meal with the dessert at the beginning —dialogue from the movie, Moulin Rouge The dialogue was spoken by Jose Ferrer as Toulouse Lautrec.
- Marriage is like a long trip in a tiny rowboat: if one passenger starts to rock the boat, the other has to steady it; otherwise they’ll go to bottom together —Dr. David R. Reuben, Reader’s Digest, January, 1973
- Marriage is like a river; it is easier to fall in than out —Anon
- Marriage is like a ship; sometimes you just have to ride out the storm —“L. A. Law,” television drama, 1987
- Marriage is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window … you may love it when you get home but it doesn’t always go with everything else in the house —Jean Kerr
- Marriage is like life in this … that it is a field of battle, and not a bed of roses —Robert Louis Stevenson
- Marriage is like panty-hose; it all depends on what you put into it —Phyllis Schlafly
- Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning handsprings or eating with chopsticks; it looks so easy till you try it —Helen Rowland
- Marriage like death is nothing to worry about —Don Herod
- Marriages are like diets. They can be ruined by having a little dish on the side —Earl Wilson
- Marriages, like houses, need constant *****ing —Nancy Mairs, New York Times/Hers, July 30, 1987 The simile was the highlighted blurb to capture reader attention. Actually it was a capsulized paraphrase from Ms. Mairs’ own concluding words: “Marriages, like houses, haven’t got ‘ever afters’.” The stucco chips off and the cat falls through the screen and the bathroom drain runs slow. If you don’t want the house falling down around your ears, you must plan to learn to wield a trowel and a hammer and a plunger.
- Marriages were breaking up as fast as tires blowing in a long race —Norman Mailer
- A marriage that grew like a great book, filling twenty-five years with many thousands of elaborate and subtle details —Larry McMurtry
- A (seventeen-year) marriage that had been *****ed like an old rubber tire gone too many miles on a treadmill —Paige Mitchell
- (She had decided long before that) marriage was like breathing, as soon as you noticed the process, you stopped it at peril of your life —Laura Furman
- A married man forms married habits and becomes dependent on marriage just as a sailor becomes dependent on the sea —George Bernard Shaw
- Married so long … like Siamese twins they infect each other’s feelings —Mary Hedin
- Marrying a daughter to a boor is like throwing her to a lion —Babylonian Talmud
- Marrying a woman for her money is very much like setting a rat-trap, and baiting it with your own finger —Josh Billings In Billings’ phonetic dialect: “munny is vera mutch like … with yure own finger.”
- Matrimony, like a dip in the sea, first stimulates, then chills. But once out of the water the call of the ocean lures the bather to another plunge —Anon
- Middle-aged marriages in which people seem stuck like flies caught in jelly —Norma Klein See Also: ENTRAPMENT
- (I am as) monogamous as the North Star —Carolyn Kizer
- The sickening cords of their marriage drying everything like an invisible paste —John Updike
- A successful marriage is an edifice that must be rebuilt every day —Andre Maurois
- They [bride and groom] looked as though they belonged on top of their own enormous cake —Paul Reidinger
- Wartime marriage … it’s like being married on top of a volcano —H. E. Bates See Also: DANGER
- Wedlock’s like wine, not properly judged of till the second glass —Douglas Jerrold
- Wife swapping is like a form of incest in which nobody’s more guilty than anybody else —Germaine Greer, Playboy, January, 1972
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